Ninth
Week Post Transplant:
April 3rd – 9th
Monday morning my Dad drove me to Boston for my sixth heart biopsy. I had Dr. Baufman again, who I really like because he has been the most gentle biopsy doctor I’ve had so far. During the procedure they have me hooked up to heart monitors, one of which beeps with each heartbeat. The skipped beats were obvious. I asked the doctor about it and he said it was not normal, but could be due to various things including magnesium deficiency. I would be getting a full run of blood work done that day. Sure enough, not only was I magnesium deficient, I was also very low in potassium. During the procedure Dr. Baufman made a comment, “Somebody give this girl a bag of potato chips.” He was referring again to my “dry” veins, which make it difficult to thread the catheter through the veins to biopsy my heart. He felt I needed more salt to increase my blood fluid levels.
The best news was that the doctor cleared me to drive. After we got home I asked Dad if he would let me drive around the block with him in the car, just so I could have a chance to get behind the wheel for the first time in months. My right leg felt shaky and my arms were weak, but I did it! It’s amazing how much strength it takes to drive.
This week I went to visit a psychoanalyst whose name is Kitty. Bob urged me to see her because he thought she could help me with the anxiety. I had second thoughts about going because I felt the anxiety was somehow my responsibility, that it was a lack of my mind’s ability to focus on the present moment. I really wasn’t sure what she could do or if she could help. I was pleasantly surprised.
Kitty explained that a part of my brain was still sending chemicals into my system as though the trauma I had experienced was still going on. The brain had not yet had time to heal, or adjust to my new healthy circumstances. She said this was natural and normal. She told me about a medicine that would balance these chemicals and reduce the anxiety. She also suggested I talk about the traumatic experiences I’ve had, or write them down--not to rehash them, but to start seeing them more objectively and less emotionally. I was so excited to hear that someone really understood what I was going through and left her office with renewed hope, as the anxiety was getting worse and it was coupled with an almost constant sense of nervousness.
I’ve been taking walks up and down the street with my Dad. My goal is to make it up the hill to the stop sign. We got about half way up this week. My heart feels up to the task, but my muscles feel heavy. They are willing, but tire very easily. It will take time. The good thing is that my body is starting to enjoy the feeling of exercise.
I also started taking coumadin this week, which is an oral blood-thinner. Next Monday will be the last day I have to give myself a Lovanox shot.
I had some really good days this week. Dad and I went out shopping in hardware stores, food stores and a yarn shop and other places and I got some practice driving. It has been a special time together. Overall, this was a very good week. The best I’ve had so far.